[VENT] Why Didn't Midwives/LCs Just Tell Me I Had Large Nipples?

[fionas]

I'm peed off with both my BF attempts/experiences.

DD1 - tried to attach her for 10 days. Basically got nowhere, thought it was me being unco and a new mum. Had lots of help from midwives and a lactation consultant (in the hospital). Lost more than 10% of weight, got sent home before milk even came in and was told to attempt to BF, express, give top-ups. Did that for a while, attachment still didn't work so expressed for two months.

DD2 - exactly the same except that I'd worded the hospital up that I had probs first time around and I REALLY wanted to get the hang of it. Had help every single feed. Attachment was OK till my milk came in then boobs blew up like melons. DD2 was a smaller baby and lost more than 10% so panic stations. Again got sent home with instructions to attempt attachment, express and give top-ups. Did that for three weeks, saw a lactation consultant twice who just told me to "Keep trying". Hard to keep trying when there is barely any progress at something you've attempted eight times per day for three weeks. Decided at the three week mark enough was enough and stopped all attempts and all expressing because it was making me sore. On the spur of the moment tried to attach again at 7 weeks. Easy as pie. Started relactation. Semi-successful. Co-fed through supply line for 3 months until very recently.

Also randomly came across information that I have very large nipples which explains why attachment was so difficult and why expressing made me so sore. Wasn't my technique, wasn't anything wrong with DDs - just plain anatomy. Solved as soon as DD's mouth got a little bigger. WHY DIDN'T ANY MIDWIFE OR LC TELL ME THIS????????? If they'd simply told me that I would have attempted attachment again with DD1 and would have expressed a lot longer with DD2 and not had to have relactated from scratch due to lack of milk. DD2 had no nipple confusion whatsoever despite the fact that she was totally bottlefed for six whole weeks, it's like we both instinctively knew when she was big enough to breastfeed as I tried again and she had no problem attaching.

Bit peed off.

[Frangipani]

Wow...that was probably my issues too...and nobody ever mentioned to me either. I had a hard time bf DS1- he was a small baby- we persevered and ended up using a nipple shield. But DS2 was bigger and after a 2 week struggle seemed to just suddenly get the hang of it- and now you mention it- he obviously had to grow into it!

Actually now i think about it my DH may have made comments along those lines- but i wasn't in the mood to pay attention cause i thought he was just being annoying.

Sorry you had to go through those issues. But glad you were able to work it out with your DD2- even though it was alot of work.

Hopefully this information on here will help any other bb members who may be having issues. Thank you for sharing it.

[fionas]

thanks Bec - unfortunately, I was never able to fully BF DD2 because although I partially relactated, it was never enough for even one BF per day so I always had to use a supply line. I've also stopped doing that because of a whole wad of extra problems and gone fully to bottle. All these problems would have been completely unnecessary if one of the so-called experts had just pointed this out to me. I would have been patient and expressed until DD was big enough and maintained enough supply so that I only had to feed DD more to increase it rather than taking drugs, expressing every hour for two weeks etc. etc.

[Bumperstump Cummerbund]

Unbelievable A friend of mine had a similar experience, her second bub couldn't feed and she tried so hard for 6 weeks, refused to give him formula, ended up with severe PND and couldn't bear to look at him for a while. She went to her doc and said it felt like bub couldn't attach properly, and doc says of course, he's tongue tied - which no-one had bothered to tell her! So it was a simple snip, but by then bub screamed whenever he went near her breast, so he had to be formula fed

Can you say anything to the 'professionals', to let them know how angry/disappointed you are?

[CrazyLady]

I think that was DD's issue. I mean no **** my nipples are almost 3cm across and DD was a tiny 2.1kg. The poor little bugger couldn't hold her tiny mouth open without wearing herself out so my supply went to ****. Also I found when expressing they'd chafe (sp?) like mad and I ended up with blisters.

[Barb Glare]

It can be so frustrating when you find a piece of information down the track...when it is too late which could explain your situation. You did such an amazing job for your little one despite your problems. We all just need to sit around the campfires a little more with our tops off. See who's got what. Occsionally there is a mis-match between the size of baby's mounth and the nipple, and the good news is that, indeed, in time (and usually quickly) your baby's mouth will grow to fit your nipples. Having said that, nearly all nipples work fine to feed a baby. Not long ago I went to see a mum at home who was expressing and bottle feeding because it was sooooooo painful to her to feed - she hadn't fed her other children. She seriously had the biggest nipples I have ever seen (and I've seen a lot!) But when she went to get her baby - he had a beautiful big mouth and soon she was feeding painfree.
Many women are told their problems are because they have *flat nipples* - this drives me mad. Small nipples, flat nipples, big nipples - they all work find. Problems that exist are usually not caused by the nipples. But sometimes if there is a size mismatch reassurance that you can feed the baby, and when he grows a little breastfeeding will work fine can be useful